advice.

{via.}

"I have no advice for anybody; except to, you know, be awake enough to see where you are at any given time, and how that is beautiful, and has poetry inside. Even the places you hate."

-Jeff Buckley-

Thanks, Nicole. :)

these days.

{via.}

"If nothing else, one day you can look someone straight in the eyes and say, 'But I lived through it. And it made me who I am today.'"

I've been looking for this quote for a long time. Well *I* haven't. But my soul has been.

Do you know what I mean?

I really feel like the universe is coming together a little bit right now. It scares me a little and some parts hurt to think about, but I appreciate it.

I'm putting myself back together. It's taken almost four years, but I'm taking back what's mine.

Everything is going to work out the best way. It may not be my way, or my friend's way, or my mom's way, but it'll be the right way, and that's enough for me.

(Oh, and let's thank Nicole, she's the one that posted this quote first and helped me find it, if a little inadvertently.)

Cheer Yourself Up, Kid

I've been complaining a lot lately, so this is my attempt at being happy.

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.
--Jules de Gaultier

Life isn't about "finding" yourself, it's about creating yourself.

-George Bernard Shaw


"We are unusual and tragic and alive." - Dave Eggers


"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace."
-Jimi Hendrix


"The Constitution only guarantees the American people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself."
-Benjamin Franklin


"When love is not madness, it is not love."
-Pedro Calderon de la Barca


"Love is much like a wild rose, beautiful and calm, but willing to draw blood in its defense."
-Mark Overby

Also, let's all celebrate, because this was post #200! Woooo! :) Thanks so much for reading!

A Little Quote For Ya

I saw this last Sunday, and it's been on my mind ever since, so I thought I'd share it with y'all.

"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are."
-Kurt Cobain

Right? Let's be ourselves today and every day after.

Broken Heart Story

I found this quote on teacups in peony's blog and I fell in love with it immediately. It's exactly how I feel about how Mr. Man and I's break up a few years ago. I don't know if you've ever had your heart broken by a boy, but I think we've all had our hearts broken by something, so maybe you'll enjoy this too:

"And maybe, just maybe, her heart needed to be broken. Broken and shattered and stomped into pieces. Then she could finally look down at the pieces, study each one and spend time getting to know the person she'd become. And when she finally had all the pieces back together again, a little crooked, a little jumbled but sealed firmly with love, she'd realized she was more beautiful than ever. Because this time, she would love herself."

-sigh.- True story. I know I'm a stronger person because I was broken hearted and alone for so long. What about y'all?

edit:// Apparently, I wasn't totally clear in this -- this is an old breakup, from before college. We've since gotten back together. :)

A Little Something to Remember

"I must learn to love the fool in me--the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries. It alone protects me against that utterly self-controlled, masterful tyrant whom I also harbor and who would rob me of human aliveness, humility, and dignity but for my fool."
-- Theodore I. Rubin, MD

Monday Mantra

This week is the first week of March, which means it's almost spring, which means it's almost SPRING BREAK.

I believe that I can make it to spring break without having a mental breakdown.

I'm addicted to coffee. This whole giving it up for six weeks at some point in the next 800 days is not going to go well.

I wish that I could eat all the sweets I wanted with NO repercussions.

I'm jealous of anyone that is napping right now.

Soundtrack/Mantra for the week "I'm tough, ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, then okay." -Madonna

Happy Monday, everyone!

MLK Jr Day

In celebration of the holiday, I thought I'd share my favorite MLK quote with y'all! :)

Cowardice asks the question -- is it safe?
Expediency asks the question -- is it polite?
Vanity asks the question -- is it popular?
But conscience asks the question -- is it right?
And there comes a time when one must take a position
that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but
one must take it because it is right.

--Martin Luther King Jr.

Audrey Hepburn Defines My Life Perfectly:

“I’m like cat here, a no-name slob. We belong to nobody, and nobody belongs to us. We don’t even belong to each other.”

-Audrey Hepburn as Holly Golightly

Hello, my name is Summer Finn

Someone told me they think the writers of (500) Days of Summer stalked me and based Summer Finn off of me.

[For those of you that haven't seen the movie, this post will make no sense to you. So, go see (500) Days, then come back and read this. Also, it will contain spoilers and I don't want to ruin the greatest movie of all time for you.]

See, there's a scene in the movie where McKenzie (Geoffery Arend), Summer (Zooey Deschanel), and Tom (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) are in a bar, and McKenzie asks Summer if she has a boyfriend. She says no, she doesn't want one. A humorous moment passes as McKenzie asks if she's a lesbian until Summer explains herself -- "I like being on my own. Relationships are messy, people's feelings get hurt. We're young, we live in one of the most beautiful cities in the world, why don't we just have fun and save the serious stuff for later?" (I may have misquoted that -- it's been over a week since I saw the movie.)

Now, College Station may not be one of the most beautiful cities in the world by most standards (though I love it), but I can see where my friend was going. That first sentence, I like being on my own, was part of why Kevin and I broke up -- I'm independent and don't like committing my time to anyone or anything. I like being able to do spur-of-the-moment things without owing anyone something, and that wasn't fair to him. And the people's feelings get hurt part? Yeah, too true, and more times than not it wasn't worth it. I've been in my share of relationships, but life always got in the way. For instance, I'm going to China soon, and I'll be there a long time -- now isn't exactly a great time for me to be getting too attached to anyone. That's just how life is these days.

So maybe I am like Summer Finn. I think I'm okay with that though. For now I'm willing to just be friends and have fun, and maybe someday I can wake up and realize what I've never been sure of up until now.

I'll leave you with one last quote from Summer and Tom:

Tom: So what happened, why didn't things work out?
Summer: What always happens; life.

Discovered

I discovered this quote on that one tumblr I used to have. (Oops.)

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…You give them a piece of you. They don’t ask for it. They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like ‘maybe we should just be friends’ or ‘how very perceptive’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."

Neil Gaiman (that's him in the photo...if you couldn't guess.)

Quotes and the like

(Yes, that photo IS mine. Ask permission before using.)

I found the quote in that picture in Travis' tumblr and liked it so much I decided to Picnik it (yeah, I used that as a verb, like Google; let it happen). I've realized how all-encompassing loss is recently now that I feel like I've really lost my hometown. I feel that that part of my life is over now, you know? That chapter is closed and done, and while I'll never be done wanting to go back and visit, I'd be okay never living there again. It makes me kind of sad though, it feels like I lost my childhood and all the illusions that come with it.

That's about all I've got to say today, but here are a few quotes I'd like to share (I'm kind of a quote-fanatic).

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." -- Goethe

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring." -- Marilyn Monroe

"I cannot believe the purpose of life is to be happy. I think the purpose of life is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate. I think it is above all to count, to stand for something. To have it make some difference that you lived at all." -- Leo Rosten (I've quoted this one before.)

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." -- Eleanor Roosevelt

"Life is beauty, admire it. Life is bliss, taste it. Life is a dream, realize it. Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it. Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfill it. Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it. Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it. Life is an adventure, dare it."
-Mother Teresa

"The supreme happiness of life is that conviction that we are loved for ourselves -- say, rather, loved in spite of ourselves." -- Victor Hugo

"Well-behaved women rarely make history." -- Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

david bowie

"I don't know where I'm going from here, but I promise it won't be boring."

David Bowie

On Life

Carpe Diem. It’s a Latin phrase from a poem by Horace, written between 65 and 8 BCE. The full line actually says “aetas: carpe diem quam minimum credula postero” which in English roughly mean “Sieze the day and place no trust in tomorrow.” I freaking love that phrase. I’m pretty sure I like it better as just “carpe diem;” the “place no trust in tomorrow” part seems rather pessimistic, and while I understand it’s supposed to say that we’re not supposed to assume we’ll have tomorrow to do anything, I like to keep things positive and hope that there will be a tomorrow to enjoy as well.

I know that not everyday can be happy and peppy and positive (heck, today wasn’t happy or peppy) but I do know that we have to spend each day living, because if you don’t live today, when the heck will you?

Carpe diem.

On Happiness

I’m not one of those people that think that a quest for happiness is the ultimate point of life. In fact, I’ve listed it last as the title of this blog (“On the Pursuit of Life, Liberty, and Happiness”) because while I think it’s a constant, if often unspoken, reason behind everyone’s behavior (and I can recognize that in my own life), I feel like it shouldn’t be. I think Leo Rosten said it best when he said, "I cannot believe the purpose of life is to be happy. I think the purpose of life is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate. I think it is above all to count, to stand for something. To have it make some difference that you lived at all."

I think that in that behavior is where we can find true happiness. I’ve already seen in my life being happy is just a side effect of being useful, honorable, and compassionate. Sure, those things can sometimes lead to pain and discomfort, but how could we know true happiness without those things?

So, that's what I'm doing. I'm being useful, I'm being honorable, I'm being compassionate. I'm standing for something. I'm making sure it makes a difference that I'm on this Earth at all.