An Open Letter About Why I Sometimes Really Hate the News

 {Source is each individual stations' website.}

I've had a cold for the past day or two, and colds make me fussy. We're talking teething toddler levels of fussy. And when I'm teething toddler levels of fussy, I hate everything with a passion and am very vocal about it. Especially the news.

And, I mean, here's the thing about the news, any news. They're all over-dramatic in ways that ARE NOT FUN. I mostly watch CNN and MSNBC (and the Daily Show and the Colbert Report), if that tells you anything, but I'm not here to bash them, or FOX, or ABC, or the Borowitz Report specifically. Mostly because the Borowitz Report is awesome and hilarious. But also because everyone is biased in their own ways, whatever. Really, I'm just here to tell all of them to get their acts together.

Dear Every News Outlet Ever,

Please stop saying that this has been the hardest winter for the US in a long time. It's not even winter yet. Check your calendar. WINTER STARTS ON DECEMBER 21ST, GUYS. Also, if you're trying to make people sit up and pay attention, saying this is the hardest fall ever is not only correct, but also more attention-grabbing because then people are like "WHOA, it's only fall and the northeast has already had a bajillion inches of snowfall?! Holy crap!"

Stop talking about how anything increases "exponentially" when you obviously have no idea what "exponentially" means. Let me help you out:

• Exponentially means something is increasing or decreasing at a rate of x multiplied by itself a designated number of times. i.e. If the temperature is rising exponentially, that means that if it started at 80 degrees, it would immediately rise to 6,400 degrees (80 times 80), then to 512,000 degrees (80 times 80 times 80)... Do you see where this is going?
• If you're going to say that the temperature in your car rises during the summer from 80 to 120 degrees Fahrenheit, a better word would be dramatically and/or quickly.

For that matter, please just learn the definition of any word you're going to say on television. This is more so you stop looking like a dumb ass than for my benefit. Promise. 

Seriously stop employing scare tactic language. I get that this economic downturn sucks, but you guys repeating daily that we're probably all going to go broke and die alone in a box if Europe's economy isn't saved isn't helping. It makes people nervous and start keeping their money under their mattress, which makes the situation worse and makes them look stupid. Also, if an economist scolds you on live national television for calling the current economic climate worse than 2008, maybe listen. He probably knows what he's talking about. I'm looking at you, Christine Romans of CNN.

For the love of God, cover real news. Yes, water-skiing squirrels are real cute, but let YouTube and the rest of the internet cover that. Also, if your prime time lead story is EVER AGAIN about the Kardashians or Jersey Shore, I'm never going to watch again (and I hope the rest of the internet doesn't either). Leave those guys to E! - that's their job. You do YOUR job and cover things that actually matter to our lives.

Fill in the _____ Friday & Friday Internet Favorites

Head on over to Lauren's blog to join in!

1.   The holiday season is    a time for family, friends, love, and being grateful for everything you have  .

2.   Snow makes me  so happy, but nervous! I love playing in the snow, but driving in it makes me anxious in a way that only impending death can     .

3.  The best comfort food to eat when it's cold out is   hot chocolate, baked potato soup, or peppermint white chocolate mochas from starbucks. .

4. Winter is the best time for   cuddling under blankets and playing outside  .

5.  I can hardly wait for   going to a Christmas tree farm with my boy today or Sunday :)   .

6.  When it comes to holiday gifts I prefer to   give than receive, though let's be honest - everyone likes to receive. This year I'm making all the gifts I give, so we'll see how that goes! .

7.  If I were to rate my excitement about the holiday season on a scale from 1-10, I would say I am at about a   6-7! It stresses me out a little (what if everyone hates the gifts I make them?!), but I'm looking forward to spending time with family. Plus, this will be my first holiday season as a graduate .

Friday Favorites:

• Does marijuana legalization lead to fewer traffic fatalities?
• Texts from Bennett. Literally, this is my favorite tumblr ever. It's only two pages long so far, but I could still read it five times a day and laugh every time. 
• The most beautiful ad for marriage equality I've ever seen. I cried a little. Thanks, Australia.  
• The photography page on Pinterest.
• A lesbian couple raised a baby and this is what they got. Moving. 
• This belt. Oh my is it precious. I bought it from H&M  last weekend, and it was the best decision!

I hope you guys have a wonderful weekend. What are your plans?

thanksgiving

 {via.}

This year, I'm thankful for: 

Surviving the terrible wreck I was in yesterday on my way home.

(Don't know what I'm talking about?)

Friends that I can call and will drop everything to come help me.

A wonderful family that I get to go see in just a few short hours. 

Knowing that soon I'll be a college graduate and have my whole life ahead of me.

And a supportive boyfriend to see me through all of it. 

What are you thankful for this year? 

Fill in the ____ & Friday Internet Favorites

 Yay! Head over to Lauren's blog to join in on all the fill in the blank fun. :)

1.   A nervous habit I have is    chewing on my lips and blushing. And as soon as I realize I'm blushing, I blush harder. It's awful  .

2.   Something that makes me sad is   writing about how children who get trafficked are 71% more likely to commit suicide than the general population... Thanks, thesis     .

3.  Today I am thankful for    no classes, free pizza for dinner tonight, and that only two more days of class stand between me and time with family  .

4. My favorite room in my house is    my bathroom. I know that's weird, but it's decorated with a very French/Paris theme, and that makes my heart so happy  .

5.  I can't stand   people who don't "believe in" mental health disorders (what?), rape jokes, people who have made it to college but don't know the difference between your/you're and or there/their/they're, and people who don't use Oxford commas .

6.  If I had an extra $100 to spend on whatever I wanted today I would   probably spend it on something for the boyfriend. He's been a wonderful person to have around for the last few weeks as I've gone crazy writing my thesis, and he deserves some reward .

7.  The last person I hung out with was    Amy. We went out for drinks last night and then I joined a few others friends and the boyfriend for dinner and more drinks . 

My favorite thing on the internet right now is Pinterest. Frankly, it's kind of the only thing that helps me keep my sanity throughout my thesis. If you're on Pinterest, follow me and leave a comment - I'd love to see what you're pinning! 

 

My thesis is killing me. This is the end. GOODBYE FOREVER.

 {This is a photo I took in China. That's about all it has to do with anything I wrote about in this post, except they kind of look like they're screaming and amen to that. Also, please don't steal it, unless your thing has to do with screaming at things in Chinese, except please still give me credit and tell me about it because that would be hilarious. Also, longest credit line ever. Also, also.}

In case you missed it (how? it's basically all I tweet, blog, and talk about these days), I'm writing a very in-depth thesis as an undergrad AND IT SUCKS.

Picking a topic WHAT?
Original research WHAT?
Making up policies that might actually work WHAT?

My thesis is about human trafficking. More specifically, my thesis argues that domestic [see: not international] trafficking of women and children for the commercial sex trade in China is a drain on China's biggest resource (spoiler: it's people), because it takes them out of the labor force, compromises their health, causes emotional and physical scars that last a lifetime without treatment, and is generally harmful to China's legitimate economy and the health of the overall population. I'm trying to argue that without specific economic and social policy changes, this problem will worsen and lead to bigger problems for China down the road, i.e. an HIV/AIDS epidemic and the slowing down of economic growth (and anger/resentment from a growing segment of its population that China is doing pretty much nothing to help right now, which will be another catalyst to the already swirling growth of frustration with the Communist Party).


Whew. 

Here's where this becomes a problem for me: That is depressing as hell topic. 

Okay, I get that that sounds petty. These women are being held as sex slaves and I'm concerned that every time I read their stories while sitting in Starbucks I want to cry and that's embarrassing?

Fine, I'm going to Hell.

But still. It's depressing, and devoting my entire semester to this research is making me want to pull my hair out. Because China is all 'Psssh, human trafficking? Forced into sexual service? Nope, those ladies be PROSTITUTES! Jail tiiiiime!" and I'm all "Noooo! Stoooop iiiiit! They need psychological treatment, not to work in a labor camp!"

And also? I have to write ~20% of this thesis in Chinese. I mean, let's talk about how Chinese is a crazy hard language and I don't know it (even after studying it for three years). So I'm spending about 50% of the time I work on this thesis just researching how to perfectly translate everything because, and I'm not exaggerating, the syllable xi can mean about 80 different things. How can you have one word that can alternately mean 'footpath,' 'west,' 'happiness,' and 'rhinoceros?' THOSE AREN'T EVEN KIND OF RELATED.

HOW DO YOU EVER LEARN A LANGUAGE WHEN ONE SINGLE SOUND CAN MEAN 80 DIFFERENT WORDS WHICH OFTEN HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH EACH OTHER? I JUST I CAN'T WHAT WHY *BRAIN EXPLOSION*

So basically, this is the end. I'm dying from crazy brain explosions in Chinese, or something. GOODBYE FOREVER.