Tuesday, May 21, 2013

I have an emotional hangover. Because Vegas.

I had no idea what to expect when I signed up for Bloggers in Sin City. I mean, "I knew" because there was an itinerary and you know, all the #BiSC tweets from last year and the year before that, so on, etc. But I was nervous - would I fit in; would I have fun; are these people all going to think I'm too young or too weird or too not-a-serious-enough-blogger to be here?

 I feel like I make this face 99% of the time.

But then I moved in with a fellow BiSC-uit, and through a few brunches met several other BiSC-uits, and suddenly the overwhelming nerves tempered down to only some kind of nerves and by the time our limo arrived at the Flamingo, I was just BELLIGERENTLY EXCITED.

What happens when you put a bunch of bloggers together in a limo? They instagram it, of course.

I don't know what it is about BiSC that creates deep emotional bonds between so many people who were basically strangers before the weekend. Is it that it's four days fueled by debauchery and laughter, or is it because it is full of the type people who would sign up to spend 4 days with a bunch of other strangers and LOVE IT? What combination of awesome people and awesome circumstances makes me cry at a brunch listening to wonderful people say even more wonderful words about all their feeeeelings?

Whatever magic comes together and makes it happen (I'm thinking glitter + 8 second hugs + Nicole & Doni's sheer willpower), I have never walked into a group and felt so instantly comfortable and loved. Between all the 8 second hugs and ALL THE EATING and all the photos together and whiskey tasting (whiskey! tasting!) BiSC was easily one of the best weekends of my life, and some of the most fun I think I've ever had. 

To go margaritas, beautiful weather, and some of the most fun people on the internet? I'm all about that life.

Pool day is the best day.
4 of the many DC bloggers. Reppin' the District in style, obvs.

Largest whiskey collection in the US. I want to go to there... again.

Our sampling. Blackberry whiskey? Delicious. The Knot? Like a warm Christmas hug in my mouth. 

And now? Now I have this bizarre emotional hangover in which I can't believe I'm not in Vegas anymore surrounded by 68 of the most amazing people ever and I just CAN'T DEAL WITH EVERY DAY LIFE, Y'ALL.  It's more than missing the planned all-you-can-eat brunches and gift bags full of goodies from Firmoo, Vega, and others and playing in the pool and using our badges to bypass the line at Pure (though those things I'll definitely miss). I can't find the words to explain the magic and the warmth of BiSC that makes people feel like they are free to be the most honest and wonderful versions of themselves -- because that's definitely true. Four days of completely genuine, lovely people all telling each other how genuine and lovely everyone is.

Sometime when I wasn't looking, I learned a lot this weekend. But the biggest takeaway I've got to offer is this: If you want to be part of amazing things (like BiSC), you've got to be brave enough to sign up for them. The moment you open yourself up to the possibility of amazing friendships and experiences, they're available to enjoy. 


Tuesday, May 14, 2013


This post exists only to say that I leave for Bloggers in Sin City tomorrow night, and I'm so belligerently excited that I just spelled 'belligerently' wrong approximately ten times because my brain is moving faster than my fingers can type.


That's all I've got. How am I expected to work when this is all my brain can think about?


Thursday, May 9, 2013

15 Things You'll Never Hear Me Say


1. Travel? No thanks, I'm content to stay in one place forever and ever.
2. I've had enough chocolate chip cookies.
3. Ew, keep dogs away from me.
4. I love it when people interrupt me.
5. Let's never do anything outdoorsy.
6. I hate Friends.
7. I would like to live in an apartment free of books.
8. Rick Perry is my favorite.
9. No, I don't want another hug.
10.  RyGos coloring book? Lame.
11. What? I never obsess about things.
12. I want to spend the next 50 years in a cubicle.
13. Coffee is the worst thing on the planet.
14. I would totally rather watch this movie than read the book it's based on.
15. But really, stop giving me hugs and stop inviting me on cool trips around the world.

Not sure where I saw these lists start, but it was too fun to pass up.

Happy Thursday!

Thursday, May 2, 2013

on perfectionism.

I am a perfectionist. As one, I can be pretty negative, pretty prone to "Welp, fuck it!" moments, and when I fail, I fail hard. Because perfectionism is not just a relentless drive for better, better, better and more, more, more; It's a mentality of varying degrees of extremism.

Perfectionism is finding myself hungry and stranded without a sugar-free option, so just eating a Butterfinger for lunch because, well, I have to have sugar no matter what so WHATEVER.

Perfectionism is wanting to quit my job because it's not going exactly how I'd like it to, even though really, it's pretty good.

Perfectionism is convincing myself that because I wasn't successful right out of college, I never will be.

Perfectionism is giving up on dating entirely "for the rest of my life" because one relationship ended badly "and I like dogs better than humans anyway!"

Perfectionism is setting goals that are obviously unrealistic but assuring myself that I'll "find a way to make it work." 

Perfectionism is not writing all month because I already didn't one day so I mean, obviously that 'write every day!' goal is in the toilet.

Perfectionism is not taking a step forward because I feel like if I can't do it the completely right way, I shouldn't do it at all.

Trying not to be a perfectionist -- to be nice to myself, to forgive myself when I make mistakes, to allow room for mistakes in the first place (as well as time to relax, breathe, and not be doing something) -- is a battle.

Combating perfectionism (for me) is yoga. Because in yoga each practice is simultaneously imperfect (I will fall out of a pose, I will lose track of my breathing, there is always a more advanced pose my body isn't ready for), and perfect because I showed up on the mat, I am trying, and that is freeing.

Perfectionism is the most self-defeating mentality. And fuck that, man.