Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Living out loud and being honest and sucking it up.

Since April I've been doing this thing where I'm not censoring myself on this blog anymore. Because, I mean, what the fuck is the point of that? It's my blog. I'll be me, you'll be you. If it doesn't work, okay.

Which is exactly what happened. I've gotten closer to people through this. A lot of you encouraged me. Encouragement made my behavior extend even further into my real life. But, there were the friends that didn't like my honesty.

I just call them people now.

Like yes, it sucks. Friend breakups are sometimes worse than romantic breakups. It doesn't matter if the ending is simply growing apart, passive-aggressive bullshit that gets swept under the rug, or an explosion of fire and OMFGIHATEYOUGODIE.

I've gone through all three. It's like... I never really know what to do, especially with the passive-aggressive. Do I try to pretend nothing happened? Do I apologize?

Then I remind myself: No. I'm an adult. If I want to get a tattoo and write a book and sleep at Mr. Man's and have a try-anything-once attitude and talk about sex, that's my prerogative. Plus, it's not like I'm being the girl that slept with 1000 men. {Sidebar: I'm not sure if that disgusts me or inspires me. STD: disgusting. Doing what you want and living life on purpose: inspiring.} I don't have to apologize for being who I am. If you don't like it, shove it don't read. Don't hang out with me.

We're adults here. We choose who we spend time with. Novel, I know. So, while it sucks that some of my friends people don't like the honest side of me, I'm sucking it up. I'm realizing that I can't please everyone, and that's okay. It is okay to be me, to live my life out loud, with purpose, and for some people to not be okay with that. It's good, even. I may ruffle some feathers, I may stir the pot, but if no one ever did that we'd never make any progress.

5 comments:

  1. "But, there were the friends that didn't like my honesty.

    I just call them people now."

    Applause for you. I just wrote a post on my own blog declaring that I will do the same thing. Just do you, and haters to the leftttt.

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  2. You can continue to be you, but I don't think I want to be. I know! I'll be you, too!

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  3. Good for you, girly!! You be you!! You rock at it ;)

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  4. Wow... I aim for the same. But I am not totally honest, and don't necessarily want everyone to know it's me. Way to go for being real!

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