In Which My Friends Were Wrong and I'm Right But I'm Not Exactly Excited About It

First of all, yay for the longest blog title ever. Like whoa. Could I be anymore ridiculous?

Oh wait, yes, I could, because I'm pissed/hurt/confused that the exact thing my friends said was going to happen isn't, even though I didn't totally want it to happen from the beginning.

Hypocrisy for the win!

It's just... Mr. Man kind of up and decided that he doesn't want to get married until he's at least 28, which is fine, okay, whatever. Except it's a really long time from now and I'm not sure I'm okay with waiting that long.

And I know, I know, I shouldn't be planning my life like we're definitely going to get married and I'm trying not to, but it's hard not to think about these things in a relationship, especially since I've loved this kid since we were like 16.

I know 28 isn't old. And his reasons are actually pretty legit -- he wants to be done with school and be financially stable and he actually said like 26 at the earliest. And that totally makes sense. And a year ago (hell, four months ago) I was saying the same thing about my life.

I don't want to get married tomorrow or next year. Really. I never did. But now that he's taken the chance of that happening away, I'm upset about it. Which makes no sense... except it does, you know? I just don't know how to explain it.

I just said, "I'm not sure if I'm okay with waiting that long." That's a lie. I'm okay with waiting that long. I don't know if I'd leave him if he said he never wanted to get married. I mean, I want a wedding and all, that's true, but at the end of the day, I don't need a piece of paper from the government telling me that I'm in love and plan on spending the rest of my life with one person. I already know that, the government doesn't do anything but give me a tax break because I realized that.

Maybe I'm only upset about this because I had gotten used to the idea that I would probably be the first of my close friends to get married. On top of that, it feels like everyone around me is getting engaged and planning their weddings and I want that. And even if they're not taking the plunge, couples are moving in together. And I want that. Except Mr. Man is actually moving to California in December (yeah, not excited) and so that's kind of impossible. It's just hard to commute from Santa Barbara to College Station every day, you know?

Hey, maybe I can be like JLo in The Wedding Planner, planning everyone else's weddings? Or like Katherine Heigl in 27 Dresses, always the bridesmaid, never the bride.


God, I depress myself.

I probably need to start hanging out with my single friends more because at this rate I'm going to drive myself absolutely crazy. Or if not myself, at least Mr. Man.

One last thing: Please, please, please go check this out and tell me about an organization you care about! :) Thanks!

img cred.

Happy Planning!

Recently, weddings have been coming up a lot in conversation.

I don't know why. I for one, don't want to get married any time soon. It's not like I don't like the idea of a pretty white dress and lots of free stuff (not to mention a huge diamond ring and getting to kiss Mr. Groom [whomever he ends up being] whenever I want), but I'm just too. damn. busy.

I won't be done with school until I'm twenty-five.

25.

Yeah, people. That's right. Damn my mom for correctly predicting that I would go to law school. Maybe even 26 if I don't graduate from TAMU on time. [I don't want to talk about it. Whores in the dean's office. JUST KIDDING. Maybe. THEY'RE SCREWING ME OVER AND THEY SHOULD ALL JUST ACCEPT THAT I'M BRILLIANT AND GIVE ME MY DEGREE ALREADY. Seriously. It's just a piece of paper that acknowledges my brilliancy. It's not. that. hard. And I'm actually WORKING for it, not like these bull honorary degree recipients. I don't CARE what they did for America/The Whole Stinkin' World, did they go to your school? NOOOO.]

BUT I DIGRESS. Wow. Anyways. Eh-hem. Weddings, right.

Despite me insisting that I-don't-want-to-plan-a-wedding-and-try-to-get-my-law-degree-at-the-same-time-because-that-sounds-stupidly-stressful, they're pretty sure I'm going to get married first.

Before we graduate TAMU, before I'm even given my acceptance letter to UCBerkeley (which I'm sure they already drafted), I will have two rings -- my Aggie ring (Whoop!) and my engagement ring. That is their plan for me.

W.T.H.

They have decided though that if I'm NOT married first, that means I will have broken up with Mr. Man and will NEVER get married. I have tried to point out the DOZENS of flaws in their logic here, but they refuse to acknowledge my intellectual superiority, thus leaving me with two choices:

Married by December 2012 or Never Married Ever Because I Suck At Life.

What do you guys think of this dress?

And So It Begins...

Disclaimer: I LOVE WEDDINGS.

Okay, now that we have that out of the way...

I knew that the day was going to come when one of my close friends got engaged and I had to prepare myself for her wedding and possibly being a bridesmaid or at the very least buying her a gift and attending all the showers and all that.

Holy crap, I didn't know it would be this soon.

I am jumping the gun a little bit -- one of my oldest friends, Sydney (yes, of this story), announced just last night/today that she's engaged! Which is really really really exciting because I know she's going to be happy with Eric, even though I've never met him. That's how many wonderful things I've heard about him (not just from her). So, even though I've already told her, I'll put it down in writing too: congratulations to her!

But wow I'm already feeling the pressure that weddings bring -- the whole 'If I go, will I have a date?' thing. (I say 'if' because she and I have kind of lost touch a bit recently and I'm not honestly sure I'll be invited). If I go, are people going to be saying 'don't worry, it'll be your turn soon!' Or wondering why I'm not getting engaged? I don't even have a boyfriend, how am I supposed to be getting engaged?! Why don't I even have a boyfriend? Am I not good enough? Is something wrong with me?!

Yes. These questions are legitimately running through my mind. I think they wouldn't be so bad if so many bloggypeople that I follow weren't getting engaged/planning their weddings too (Teacups in Peony, Katelin, etc...). But I suddenly feel like I am surrounded by diamond rings and white dresses and flowers and wondering why the hell I don't even have a boyfriend!

I know, I probably need to just step back and take a breath and focus on just being really really happy for Sydney and Eric. :) Because I AM really really insanely happy for Sydney and Eric.

But holy crap, I'm freaking out.