Thursday, June 24, 2010

Need everything in life be defined?


Love. It's this ridiculous, powerful emotion (or way of life?) that ties us all together; it is our one thing to bind us as a common race, yet it it remains so elusive and impossible to pin down and get a good look at.

But if we could look at it, examine it, hold it in our hand and name it's attributes, would we all see the same thing? It's different for all of us, I feel sure of that.

For me, being in love is about feeling just a little bit more alive when with that person. It's about feeling like there is excitement in every direction and that we could strike sparks anywhere. It's about having a universal sense that what we're doing is right.

To me, falling in love is finding someone who enjoys watching movies and cuddling on the couch as much as I do. It's about being with someone who wants to live as loudly, voraciously, and in the moment as I do. It's someone who laughs when I'm being crazy and holds me when I'm sad, and will let me do the same for him. Love is finding someone who is enthusiastic about a simple night hanging out with friends over pizza, and believes like I do that some things in life, like alcohol, sex, and friendships get better with intensity. Love is finding someone who can sometimes surprise you by knowing you better than you know yourself and can identify the smallest parts of your person and love them.

In a lover, I need a man that understands that there are always going to be things that I over-analyze, and he definitely can't scare easy. He needs to accept that the only things I'm sure about in life are my love of coffee, my love of hugs, and my need to write. He needs to understand that I have a weird thing about my wrists and they cannot be touched, and that there are some things I just have to do in a certain order. I need someone who can be vocal about his feelings for me and isn't afraid to hold my hand in front of his friends. I need someone who is spontaneous and will drag me along on his adventures when I'm being too cautious, and will also come along on my escapades. I want someone who can handle me, but won't try to tame me, and also understands that I may try to run, but I'll always come back.

I don't need someone who is thinking about the future too much because I'll be thinking about it enough for the both of us. And I need him to be okay with the fact that I'm going to do that. I don't need someone who will tell me I'm his world because he has a whole world of things that don't include me, just as I have a whole world of things that don't include him. At the foundation of all these definitions is a safe place; I need someone who will keep me safe in his heart, who will let me have a warm place to come home to. I want him to stand next to me, to block out the world when I can't handle it, face it with me when I can and say, "Bring it on."

How do you define love? Is there anything you need or look for?

This post has been brought to you in part by Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop.



  2. You're right, if everyone in the world could hold love in their hands, I don't think any two would describe it the same. For me the feeling of love is sitting in my fat pants, no make-up and ponytail running on 4 hours sleep and the hubby handing me a coffee saying "morning pretty girl" and meaning it. I see you're a lover of iced coffee, any homemade recipes you'd like to share :-), I am a bit of caffeine junkie :-)

  3. That was beautiful! I really enjoyed reading it - it definitely reminded me of how truly blessed I am. I have the BEST husband in the world, and in fact, it was seventeen years ago today that we went out on our first date - and we've never looked back.

  4. Wow! I really loved this post! Seriously. Great writing.

    I love the part about having a world outside of you.

  5. This was really beautiful! I think so many of us can relate to needing that "safe place".


Commenting? How lovely. Please try not to talk about dead cats.