I Cooked This (And No One Died!)

Which, really, is kind of an accomplishment.

Not that my cooking has ever actually killed anyone. Yet. There have been times when it looked like it might though.

WE'RE GETTING OFF TRACK.

You might have seen a few days ago that I tweeted about craving brownies so badly that I dreamt about them (you didn't, you say? Why aren't you following me on twitter then?). So, I ventured out to the local HEB at 6:30 pm on a Sunday (that was stupid) to buy ingredients to make the richest, most delicious brownies I've ever had in my entire life.

AND I MADE THEM.

Now, thanks to the power of the internet, you can make them too.

Valorie's Ridiculous Cookie Fudge Brownies of Awesome.  

Ingredients: 
3 cups crumbled chocolate chip cookies

1/2 cup melted butter
1/2 cup better
3 oz unsweetened chocolate, coarsely chopped
1 cup sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
2/3 cup all-purpose flour
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup chopped almonds (optional [I didn't use them])
1 cup semisweet chocolate pieces
6 oz softened cream cheese
1/2 cup powdered sugar

1. Preheat oven to 350. Mix crumbs and melted butter. Press mixture firmly against bottom and sides of 8x8x2 or 9x9x2 inch baking pan. Bake for 7-8 minutes. Remove from oven, allow to cool.

2. In a medium saucepan, melt butter and and unsweetened chocolate over low heat, stirring constantly. Remove from heat; cool.

3. Stir sugar into cooled chocolate. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating with a spoon until combined. Stir in vanilla.

4. In a small mixing bowl, stir together flour and baking soda. Add mixture to chocolate mixture; stir until combined. If desired, stir in nuts at this point. Spread the batter in the pan with the cookie crumble crust.

5. Bake for 30 minutes for the 8-in pan or 25 for the 9-in pan.

6. While brownies are baking, melt 1 cup semisweet chocolate pieces over low-heat in a saucepan, stirring constantly. Remove from heat, cool slightly. In a small bowl, stir together 6 oz cream cheese and 1/2 cup powdered sugar. Stir in melted chocolate until smooth.

7. Cool brownies on wire wrack, spread with chocolate cream cheese frosting.

Enjoy! :)

Scenes from Austin.

Made the hour and a half drive to Austin yesterday to do a bit of exploring and see Matt Pond in concert.

Yes, on a Tuesday. 

It was probably the best decision I've made in a long while. 

I've been craving an escape from College Station and this was perfect timing. 

All photos mine. Check out more here. :)

How was every one else's Tuesday?

Photo Blog: Montreal

This is probably one of the most fun groups of people I've gotten to spend a weekend with in a long time. 

I'd go back in a heart beat. 

a year in self-portraits, and other insane ideas.

 {day two.}

I wanted to see how far into this month I'd make it before I started talking about resolutions. Because, really, I didn't want to look at a resolutions post from January 1 on March 20 and be like, "oh yeah... I forgot about that... Hmm..." Which I guess could still happen, except that I don't think so because, well, I SAID SO.

Anyway, I didn't really make a whole lot of resolutions this year. Partly because I tend to not make resolutions, *mostly* because I normally forget what they are a week in. But this year, this ridiculously exciting year, I decided to make three resolutions.

1. Cook once a week. I don't mean like defrost a pizza. I mean cook a legitimate meal from scratch.

2. Wear heels once a week. I'll probably fall a lot, but I'll look hot doing it!

3. Take a self portrait every day.

{day six.}

This is going to be a year of realized dreams. I'm leaving for Montreal later today! I'll (hopefully) finally see New Orleans. I'm getting my Aggie Ring (April 15!). I'm going to finally study abroad. I graduate from college in December. And a hundred other things. I want to remember it all. I want pictures of all of it. I've gotten off to a decent start, documenting my move into my apartment, and I'm excited to see where this project takes me.

{day eighteen.}

I'm posting these photos on Flickr. If you have a Flickr, find me so we can connect there. :)

Happy New Year :)

{via.}

Happy New Year, everyone! Here's an Irish blessing for everyone, from my family to yours:

May the road rise to meet you,
may the wind be always at your back,
may the sun shine warm upon your face,
the rains fall soft upon your fields and,
until we meet again,
may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Bye, 2010. Hey there, 2011.

{via.}

I didn't participate in Reverb 10, but I read everyone else's responses to the prompts and loved them, as well as thought on them on my own. I don't think I could encapsulate 2010 into one word, but I think I've gotten it in one phrase:

I should have...

I should have known you would be no good for me. I should have written more. I should have apologized. I should have taken more pictures. I should have tried harder. I should have traveled more. I should have been careful. I should have focused. I should have been grateful. I should have enjoyed myself.

I should have, I should have, I should have.

I know those all sound negative. But, even though there were many parts of 2010 that I loved and wouldn't give back for the world, overall I think this is the only year I ever ended on an unhappy note. And really, I know this isn't just The Darkness talking; these are legitimate things that I wish I could change. 2010 was a rough year; I lost both family pets, almost died in a near-fatal car accident, and slammed head first into my Quarter-Life Crisis.

That said, I did learn a lot in 2010. It was a year made for learning about myself, the world around me, and where I fit into it. I know that will continue, and that's exciting.

But for me, I want 2011 to be about carpe diem, seizing the day; Do Epic Shit. If the Mayans were right and this is the last full year ever, then it will be a year of laughter, of pictures, of inspiration, of doing what's right. I'll continue to learn, and to grow; barring all catastrophes, I'll graduate from college. I'll live alone for the first time, and I'll take advantage of that to the fullest. I'll spend a good part of it abroad, and hopefully I'll master one language, perfect another, and start yet another. I'll stop calling myself a writer, and actually write.

I know I'll make mistakes. There will be things I look back on that will make me cringe. But that's okay. 2011 will be a good year; I will make it so.

Merry Christmas... late as always.

As always, I'm a few days late.

But I had to go through these and edit them.
As well as finally acquire some internet access.
Since we're in the middle of moving
(I know... AGAIN. And, and BACK to DFW. I KNOW.)
and our current temp apartment doesn't have internet.My cousin, Emily, with their adorable new puppy. It was like a giant ball of fluff.

Merry (belated) Christmas from my family to yours. :)

Did you guys all have a wonderful Christmas? And for my non-Christian friends, did you have a wonderful Saturday? :) How many of you are caught in the blizzard?

Declaration of Womanhood

I hold these truths to be obvious (as well as somewhat bitchy, and only kind of satirical) that all Women are human, that sometimes Women cannot be perfect. That it is the right of Women to occasionally lose their shit, that though they try their best to "do it all," it is their privilege, their duty, to stand up and protest when the expectations of Society and The Media have become too much.

Article One: I am a real woman. I do not have the body of an adolescent boy; I'm not all straight lines and no hips. I'm healthy and I have curves. Learn to like them or try dating other men.

Article Two: Me saying, "I want to be single," does NOT translate to, "Try harder." It also doesn't mean, "Buy me something," or, "Express your undying love for me." Sometimes though, it does mean GTFO.

Article Three: I fart sometimes. I also burp, sneeze, bleed, and cough. Sometimes I even poop. I'm not made from some combination of fairy dust and porcelain skin that exempts me from all that. They're all natural bodily functions. Get over it.

Article Four: "No," does not mean, "Yes."

Article Five: I am not your damsel in distress. I do not need you to ride in on your white horse and "save" me. I can handle my own shit, and if I can't, I'll ask for help.

We, therefore, in appealing to Common Sense, do declare that we are not some superhuman being that can do everything and anything, be everything and anything, and still show up for dinner looking like we just stepped out of a Victoria's Secret catalogue; that we are absolved from the more inane expectations of The Media and Society, and anyone who tries to tell us otherwise is going to get punched in the face.

the most productive insomnia of my life.

It is 2:20am as I write this. I've been up since 9am yesterday morning. But I'm not tired because WEEEEE INSOMNIA.

I will hate myself for not taking sleeping pills tomorrow, but for now I'm okay with that because this has been the most productive insomnia ever ever ever.

Normally, I'm not at all productive this late at night. I don't do anything but sit around and cry on facebook about how I'm so tired but can't sleep. HELPFUL, I KNOW. But tonight, GLORIOUS TONIGHT OF ALL NIGHTS, I have finished packing up for my impending move in a few weeks, uploaded 100+ photos to my flickr account, did some actual writing not at all connected to this blog post, decided what to get people for Christmas, cooked a *big girl* meal, researched a camera lens I really want like whoa, did some research for my trip to China next summer and began filling out an application for that, and danced around like a lunatic to good music.

I KNOW.

I'm not sure who the hell this new productive Valorie is, but I'm a fan of her. SHE GETS SHIT DONE. SHE HAS HER ACT TOGETHER. HOW LONG DO YOU THINK I CAN TYPE IN CAPS BEFORE I JINX IT?

Also, this new productive Valorie started a tumblr recently, Inspiration Everlasting. It's where I (and productive Valorie -- we might be two different people, it's still up in the air) just blog anything seen/heard/noticed that inspires me, that I think is beautiful, that makes me smile. I'd love to connect with any of you who have a tumblr there too, so hit me up on that link and please feel free to submit anything you see that inspires you! :)

By the way, I just want to say how awesome you guys are. Y'all's support these past few post, especially for ones like The Nouns, which became y'all's favorite post over night apparently, has really been great for me to see with how stressful life has been recently. So, you know, you guys rock and yay. Thanks. BUT ENOUGH WITH THE MUSHY.

I was going to try to leave you with photos from Rock the Republic (which is most of what I uploaded to flickr tonight and you should TOTALLY check out --> here <-- but Blogger seems to not feel like uploading pictures consistently. Is anyone else having that problem? I may try again tomorrow, so check back. :)

The Nouns.

{I don't honestly know whose this is. But it isn't mine.}

I've gotten to the stage after a break-up where I flirt with basically everything that moves. Well, and is male. Mostly. Anyway, this is a dangerous stage for me. Because I inevitably end up meeting (or just noticing) someone really cool and deciding I'm totally ready to be in a relationship again BUT I'M REALLY NOT THIS TIME.

And even though there are about five really cute and/or sweet guys in my life right now, I'm just going to keep screaming that in my head. And at y'all. Because they don't listen. Get excited.

So instead of texting them, I'm going to sit here and admit that I've gotten to a point in my life where there are some things I just won't compromise on. I've dated enough good guys (and more than enough bad ones) that my standards are high now. Come join me up here, won't you? And so, I present:

Nouns I Promise Not to Put Up With Anymore
{This list has been inspired by this post by The Frenemy. And yes, I did also agree to the Manifesto.}

• Anyone who doesn't think Friends is awesome.
• The DRUG DEALER.
• The guy that jokes about rape.
• One word text messages.
• Broken promises.
• The inability to understand that I like to be alone sometimes.
  
• Anyone who doesn't like my friends or family.
  
• Anyone who thinks depression is something you can just "get over."
• Lies.
  
• Stupid dating games.
• Slackers with no ambition.
• Guys that have slept with more girls than they are old.
  
• Someone whose feelings toward me I just kind of have to guess/assume instead of KNOW.
• The is-this-a-date-or-are-we-just-hanging-out moment.
• Someone who doesn't like to read.
• Skinny jeans on men. [Amended on 12. 11. 2010 -- some guys totally can pull this look off. Yum.]
  
• Guys who preach to me.
• Email ask-outs. CALL ME, YOU WIMP.
• Anyone who doesn't find me impressive.
• The guy that isn't okay with me having more boys who are friends than girls who are friends.
  
• Clingy guys.
• Guys that don't like to cuddle.
  
• People that party more nights of the week than they don't.
• The guy that thinks he knows what's best for me. I am a grown ass woman, I can take care of myself.
• Someone who makes me feel like I need to act differently around him.
• Jealous boys.
  
• Anyone that doesn't want to live loudly and voraciously.
  
• Someone who uses a pet name more than my real name.
• Guilt trips.
  
• The guy that I'm only interested in because he has a job and seems relatively stable and healthy.
  
• Bad tippers.
• The guy that has to act totally macho in front of his friends. The DudeBro.
• Anyone who doesn't think I. Fucking. Rock.
• The guy that's still in love with/hung up on his ex.
• Anyone that doesn't get my humor.
• Guys named Alex. (Sorry.)
• Someone who won't be up front and honest with me.
  
• Rude boys.
• The straight up refusal to dance. Ever.
  
• Somebody who isn't as excited about me as I am about him.
  
• Guys with no fashion sense whatsoever.
  
• Someone who thinks Texas is the best thing to happen to the planet ever and never wants to leave ever ever. Like, what?
• Boring people.
  
• Guys that do not stop calling me "Val," no matter how many times I say not to.
  
• SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T GET HOW LEGIT AND AWESOME I AM.

So, a deal: In return for these things, I promise not to settle or be a crazy bitch. Well, 99% of the time. And yes, I totally get that I'm probably going to end up dying alone, but I'm okay with that at this point.

Confessions.

{via.}

Confession is defined as an admission of misdeeds or faults. (You know, according to Google. And we all know how right Google always is.) Well, this is my confession:

I have no idea how to be completely single. Since the seventh grade, I have not been completely single for more than a month. There were times in high school and college where nominally I was, as in we weren't "exclusive" or whatever. But I really don't think I've ever not been involved with someone.

I have no idea how to be alone.

I am completely 100% single rightthissecond and I want to stay that way. I want to meet this single Valorie, this girl who I've never even seen. I'm a little sad that I didn't get to meet her as a teenager, but I assume she'd be cool as a twenty-something too.

Because, let's face it: I need to learn how to be alone.

Right this second, being completely 100% uninvolved with anyone is involving a lot of running, a lot of crying, and listening to "You Start Over Your Way" by Randy Rogers Band on repeat. However, I'm sure this isn't all being single includes. But I'm so used to jumping into another fling or relationship right after this part that I don't know what comes next.

So, confession: I still have a lot to learn.

edit, later: My cousin tweeted this today and I just had to quote it: Single isn't a status. It's a word that best describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others. Needed that today.

This post was brought to you in part by Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop.

Rock The Republic

Just a little iPhone shot to show you what I'm doing this weekend. I work for the Maroon Weekly now and I'll be at Rock the Republic, a music fest in Bryan, TX all weekend. If you're there, find me in my Maroon Weekly shirt and say hi! :)

weekend plans.

{via.}

Find a Halloween costume.

Get some sleep.

Take a bubble bath.

Relax.

Read something not school related.

Catch up with my friends.

Play with a puppy.

Laugh.

Be outside.

What are your plans for this weekend?

{via.}

things that make me smile.

{via.}

I could be upset right now if I really wanted -- Mr. Man and I broke up, summer is going away and Texas seems to be skipping right to winter, school is stressful, one of my teachers is an ass -- but there are just too many things to smile about.

Old reruns of Pinky and the Brain.
Meeting an online friend in real life.
Planning to meet another some time soon.
Walking my friend's dogs with him in cool weather.
Writing.
Feeling like the universe is giving me each day as a personal gift.
Knowing I'll be seeing my cousin in Dallas this weekend.
Having friends that remind me they love me every day.
Donating money to a nonprofit I barely even knew existed. (Thanks, Olivia Rae!)
Knowing that people like the guys doing Pedal for Prevention exist.
Starting my Wreck This Journal.
Volunteering.
Getting a photography internship with a local newspaper.
Laughing, a lot.
Eating whatever the hell I want.
Teaching a little girl how to read.
Considering a new tattoo.
Finding some new pen pals.
Joining campus organizations that are doing something good for the world.
Living life loudly and voraciously.
This one week of fall weather Texas is giving us.
Feeling healthy enough to go running again.
Reading inspiring blogs.

What are you guys smiling about these days?

Weekend in photos.

Saturday.

Sunday.

Pictured: Cyndi, Mollee, and Stephanie.