Thursday, December 30, 2010

Bye, 2010. Hey there, 2011.

I didn't participate in Reverb 10, but I read everyone else's responses to the prompts and loved them, as well as thought on them on my own. I don't think I could encapsulate 2010 into one word, but I think I've gotten it in one phrase:

I should have...

I should have known you would be no good for me. I should have written more. I should have apologized. I should have taken more pictures. I should have tried harder. I should have traveled more. I should have been careful. I should have focused. I should have been grateful. I should have enjoyed myself.

I should have, I should have, I should have.

I know those all sound negative. But, even though there were many parts of 2010 that I loved and wouldn't give back for the world, overall I think this is the only year I ever ended on an unhappy note. And really, I know this isn't just The Darkness talking; these are legitimate things that I wish I could change. 2010 was a rough year; I lost both family pets, almost died in a near-fatal car accident, and slammed head first into my Quarter-Life Crisis.

That said, I did learn a lot in 2010. It was a year made for learning about myself, the world around me, and where I fit into it. I know that will continue, and that's exciting.

But for me, I want 2011 to be about carpe diem, seizing the day; Do Epic Shit. If the Mayans were right and this is the last full year ever, then it will be a year of laughter, of pictures, of inspiration, of doing what's right. I'll continue to learn, and to grow; barring all catastrophes, I'll graduate from college. I'll live alone for the first time, and I'll take advantage of that to the fullest. I'll spend a good part of it abroad, and hopefully I'll master one language, perfect another, and start yet another. I'll stop calling myself a writer, and actually write.

I know I'll make mistakes. There will be things I look back on that will make me cringe. But that's okay. 2011 will be a good year; I will make it so.

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