Saturday, March 6, 2010

Food Crime

Yep. That's right. I have committed a food crime.

Today, I called a Lean Cuisine meal, -gulp-, delicious.

What has happened to me!? I used to be a GOOD American -- I ate greasy fast food like pizza and burgers and never disgraced my plate with a bit of green leafy rabbit food.

Then today, I was eating a lean cuisine for lunch like I normally do because I don't have time for much else. It was one of the pizza ones. I took it out of the microwave, plopped down on the couch in front of the TV (true American there), took a bite, and said aloud (to no one), "Wow, this is delicious."

Then, I thought of real pizza. The kind that is delivered to you in a cardboard box by some pimply teenager, and if you don't eat it fast enough the grease will soak through the bottom. The kind like this. Now, doesn't that look delicious? Just look at all the grease dripping off of it. I'm practically gaining weight just looking at it! How perfectly American, right?

But I used the word 'delicious' to describe diet food! FROZEN diet food at that. This is un-American. It's got to be against the Constitution somehow, somewhere, right? "We, as the United States of America, shall for all posterity enjoy our greasy food and fat; We shall, as a nation, abhor the taste all 'diet' foods, no matter how much they may slim us down or make us healthier"? RIGHT?

Is this enjoy-healthy-food-thing a symptom of growing up? Am I becoming, -gulp-, an adult?

1 comment:

  1. Say it isn't so. An ADULT. The word alone makes me shiver. I think you're safe until you start comparing the deliciousness of fiber drinks.
    Thanks for visiting my BLOG.


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