Tuesday, March 2, 2010

On Hairtastrophes and Why Mall Massages SUCK

I mentioned in my Weekend Whoop! post that my Saturday was fun with a sprinkling of catastrophe, right?

Or should I say hairtastrophe?

It was awful. Traumatic. I mean, first, I couldn't catch a break with the whole masseur (male massageguyperson) that had no idea what he was doing and left me BRUISES that made Mr. Man wonder why I'd even bothered to let anyone give me a massage but him. AND PAY MONEY FOR IT, MAY I ADD? At least I can pay Mr. Man with a kiss and dinner, which I was going to make anyways... but I digress.

So, my back is still pretty sore from that. I'm pretty sure the man came close to dislocating my shoulder, too. ARMS DON'T BEND THAT WAY, DUDE. And the most insulting part? HE WAS WEARING DOCTORS' SCRUBS. You work in a MALL, dude. Seriously.

But then, THEN, I go to the hair salon where I've been going since I was ELEVEN, and the woman I normally go to had some emergency so they stuck me with this other random INTERN. You see where this is going. I AM A REGULAR CUSTOMER AND HAVE BEEN FOR EIGHT YEARS. WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?

-sigh- So, I tell her I want this cut to the left:
And I know, I KNOW, the picture isn't the most excellent quality. But you can see the length and the layering and the kind of sexy shagginess. It's pretty darn obvious! Instead, I get this bob (below). Which, while I have finally gotten to the point where I can admit it's kindofmaybe cute, IT'S MUCH SHORTER AND NOT LAYERED. (It looks like it is because I have it tucked behind my ear, but I assure you it's not.) I AM INSECURE ABOUT MY HAIR PEOPLE. I don't like it that short.

That terrible photo (in which I look angry and like I have a doublechin -- I don't) is after I restyled it. The way she styled it was poofier than I like, which made it look shorter, and also like I sort of maybe had a PERFECT SPHERE FOR A HEAD. I almost cried when I first saw it. What have I gotten myself into, I asked? I cannot tie this up in a ponytail if I'm late for class. I now look about 16. This is not okay!

I am not a fan.

1 comment:

  1. that is a total tragedy! and a massage that left you with bruises?? who DOES that? seriously. i would want my money back.

    and the hair? It honestly doesn't look that bad in the picture, but i definitely sympathize with asking for one style and getting another. sucks. for sure. but you know what the difference is between a good hair cut and a bad one?

    about two weeks. :)


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